So I decided to cut all my hair off! This was not an easy decision for me, but did it. After the big chop I felt so beautiful as if all those ideas and thoughts placed in my head as a child and an Adult, that you’re not pretty if you don’t have “long hair’ were all lies. In the black community hearing those things were very normal.
I Thought I Would Look So Manly
I have to admit social media such as Instagram helped me a lot because I saw other beautiful women who looked like me rock short hairstyles such as the one that I got. After 3 months I can honestly say that this was the best thing I could have ever done and I am loving every second of it.
This may be a sensitive topic for some. I know for me it’s kind of touchy; I’m literally cringing as I write this, but it needs to be addressed.
I am in my 30’s, and in my past, I dealt with unemployed gentlemen (when I was in my 20’s). I have recently dated a guy who is also in his 30’s and jobless. He tried to take me on an inexpensive date, or he’ll tell me we can’t go anywhere because “he doesn’t have it.” Needless to say, I don’t go on dates with this guy anymore.
I’m cringing as I write this because I really don’t and can’t understand a GROWN MAN not having a job. I am digging deep within me, trying to find some sympathy, but it’s nowhere to be found.
Once, we went on a date to Olive Garden, where I was only allowed to eat the salad, and he ate the soup. The total for the meal came out to around; I think $10.00. The part that really got to me is he didn’t leave a TIP! I said something about it, and he still didn’t budge. Okay, so I know you’re thinking, “why didn’t you leave a tip”? well, guys, I didn’t have cash on me; I actually told him that he could have given me the cash and let me pay with my card so that I can at least leave a TIP.
We went on on another date; the lady who sat next to us at the bar paid for our drinks. Guys, as soon as she offered and paid, he hurried up and gathered our things to leave. I think he did that so he wouldn’t have to pay for the next round of drinks.
My personal feelings about a jobless man
My personal feelings about a “jobless man” are as follows; no matter what, you should be bringing in some income, rather you have to scrub floors or flip burgers. “Can I get a AMEN”!
No woman should have to carry the responsibilities on her own because her man is an aspiring rapper or singer or because he can’t handle someone giving him orders.
As I was strolling through my YouTube today, I came across a video from the local radio station in Houston interviewing a family that practiced Polygamy.
Now, I am not the type to judge instantly, but their situation wasn’t normal. This particular family formed because the “husband” in the relationship got caught cheating on his wife. When the wife found out that her husband was cheating, she decided to meet the “side piece.”
Needless to say, they decided to form a Polygamist relationship. The thing that caught my attention was when the interviewer asked the husband if it was okay if the woman wanted to bring another man into their marriage. Well, the answer to that question was NO.
I instantly became irritated because that is not fair. Why should the guy get to have two women? Why should the guy get to keep his side piece and his wife?
On the other hand, I watched another video with Brother Polight, who is also a Polygamist. He explained that practicing Polygamy helps with raising a family. Brother Polight sees his family as a business structure. In the video I watched, he broke down the fact that there isn’t enough time in the day to work, clean, eat, bathe, take care of your children, and relax if you’re doing it all yourself. However, I didn’t want to. I kind of agreed with that statement. Honestly, it still doesn’t justify why he needs several wives. Some alternatives can assist if you don’t have enough time in the day, like getting a Nanny.
I feel like Polygamy is a male-dominated relationship, and it’s for the man’s own selfish needs. I may be wrong, but in the first video below, that’s the vibe I got. In the second video, Brother Poilight made some good points, but I still feel like Polygamy is a selfish act beneficial to men.
Let’s talk about dating in your 30s. My question is, should we date men that are older than us to get better results? The reason I’m asking is because since I’ve been divorced dating has been horrible! The men are either too into themselves, too boring, orrrr they’re are just pure manipulators. Am I wrong? One question men ask on dates that gets under my skin is the infamous ‘what do you like to do for fun’? I know it’s weird but if I were to be honest with them I would come off as the most boringness person in the world. Since being divorced i’ve just now found a little piece of my self, so I’m still a work in progress. I say all this to say when I’m asked that question my answer is ‘nothing’.